Post by Jesse on Jun 10, 2007 15:05:26 GMT
A young girl from the mountains of Tennessee was going on a date.
Her grandmother said, "Sit here and let me tell you about those young boys.
He is going to try and kiss you, you are going to like that, but don't let
him do that"......"He is going to try and feel your breasts, you are going
to like that, but don't let him do that"....."But most important, he is
going to try and get on top of you to have his way with you. You are going
to like that, but don't let him do that. It will disgrace the family."
With that bit of advice, the granddaughter went on her date. The next day
she told grandma that her date went just like she had predicted.
"Grandma, I didn't let him disgrace the family. When he tried, I just
turned over, got on top of him, and disgraced his family."
===============================================
The Alabama preacher said to his congregation, "Someone in this congregation has spread a rumor that I belong to the Ku Klux Klan. This is a horrible lie and one which a Christian community cannot tolerate.
I am embarrassed and do not intend to accept this. Now, I want the party who did this to stand and ask forgiveness from God and this Christian Family."
No one moved. The preacher continued, "Do you have the nerve to face me and admit this is a falsehood? Remember, you will be forgiven and in your heart you will feel glory. Now stand and confess your transgression." Again all was quiet.
Then slowly, a drop-dead gorgeous blonde with a body that would stop traffic rose from the third pew. Her head was bowed and her voice quivered as she spoke, "Reverend there has been a terrible misunderstanding. I never said you were a member of the Ku Klux Klan. I simply told a couple of my friends that you were a wizard under the sheets."
The preacher fell to his knees, his wife fainted, and the congregation roared!
Her grandmother said, "Sit here and let me tell you about those young boys.
He is going to try and kiss you, you are going to like that, but don't let
him do that"......"He is going to try and feel your breasts, you are going
to like that, but don't let him do that"....."But most important, he is
going to try and get on top of you to have his way with you. You are going
to like that, but don't let him do that. It will disgrace the family."
With that bit of advice, the granddaughter went on her date. The next day
she told grandma that her date went just like she had predicted.
"Grandma, I didn't let him disgrace the family. When he tried, I just
turned over, got on top of him, and disgraced his family."
===============================================
The Alabama preacher said to his congregation, "Someone in this congregation has spread a rumor that I belong to the Ku Klux Klan. This is a horrible lie and one which a Christian community cannot tolerate.
I am embarrassed and do not intend to accept this. Now, I want the party who did this to stand and ask forgiveness from God and this Christian Family."
No one moved. The preacher continued, "Do you have the nerve to face me and admit this is a falsehood? Remember, you will be forgiven and in your heart you will feel glory. Now stand and confess your transgression." Again all was quiet.
Then slowly, a drop-dead gorgeous blonde with a body that would stop traffic rose from the third pew. Her head was bowed and her voice quivered as she spoke, "Reverend there has been a terrible misunderstanding. I never said you were a member of the Ku Klux Klan. I simply told a couple of my friends that you were a wizard under the sheets."
The preacher fell to his knees, his wife fainted, and the congregation roared!